YOSEF'S STRANGE BEHAVIOR

Meforshim have a very difficult time trying to explain Yosef’s seemingly strange behavior. Why didn’t he try to contact his father during his many years in Egypt? Certainly, as Pharaoh’s viceroy, the first thing he should have done was contact his father and let him know the great news. Why keep his father in agony and pain for so many years? Keeping it a secret in order that his dreams will be fulfilled in their entirety, as some meforshim explain, was certainly not reason enough to keep his father suffering on his account. G-d has multiple ways to make his dreams come true and this should be none of his concern. He had to do what’s right! Even more difficult to understand is his demand that his brother Binyomin come to Egypt. Didn’t he know the great pain and suffering this would cause his father? What right did he have to make such a demand? And why did he put the money back into their bags the first time they came to see him? What was he trying to accomplish? Even more difficult to understand is why he hid the magical cup in Binyomin’s bag, making him and his brothers go through such a terrifying ordeal. Why cause them all this unnecessary agony? Why not reveal himself to them immediately? Why cause Binyomin so much embarrassment? Why prolong the pain and suffering? One must also try to understand why his brothers deceived their father into believing he was killed by a wild animal. Wouldn’t it have been far better for them to have claimed that they never saw him and didn’t know his whereabouts?
In order to try and understand Yosef’s strange behavior, let’s put ourselves in his shoes. His brothers sold him, claiming that he deserved this punishment for having falsely accused them of sins that they had not committed. They didn’t dare kill him because they knew quite well that Yaakov would never forgive them for it - or perhaps they felt the punishment was too severe. This is why Yehuda decided to take him out of the pit and sell him instead.
Yosef must have wondered what his brothers would tell his father when they came home without him. His brothers had only two options. Either they would tell their father that they had sold him as a slave and try to justify their actions, or they would tell him that they had no idea where he was. In either case, he knew that his father would do everything in his power to search for him and would never give up his search until he was found.
However, never could he have imagined or even suspected that his brothers would take his shirt and dip it into blood and try to deceive Yaakov into believing that a wild beast tore him apart and that he was now dead. He was sure that his brothers would never cause such pain and aggravation to his father. He was also sure that such a scheme would never have worked, even if they had tried it. That’s because he knew full well that both his father and grandfather, who was still alive, were great prophets and couldn’t be fooled so easily. He knew that his father would certainly interrogate them very carefully and get to the bottom of the matter and find out that they had sold him as a slave. Yosef was sure that either they had told their father the truth - that they had sold him as a slave - or that they told him they never saw him and didn’t know his whereabouts.
Either way, Yosef was sure his father would do everything in his power to search for him, try to discover his whereabouts and bring him back home. Egypt and Midyon weren’t as populous as they are today, and the slave market wouldn’t be hard to find and trace. His brother Naftali had managed to run through the entire city of Mitzrayim within a short time. Yosef was sure that his father would send them to Egypt or Midyan or to Sh’chem to search for him and bring him back home.
Yosef’s brothers knew this as well. They knew that if they told their father that they didn’t see him or that they had sold him as a slave, Yaakov would immediately search for him and never give up the search until he would ultimately be found. This is the very reason why his brothers were forced to deceive their father and get him to believe that he was dead. This way Yaakov would never search for him. They had no other option. If Yaakov had found him and discovered what they had done to him, they’d be in real hot water.
Yosef could never imagine that they dared deceive his father into believing he was dead. He was sure that this would never work and neither would they cause him such pain. Therefore, when nobody came to search for him in Egypt, he was both shocked and puzzled. Surely his father must have realized when he didn’t come home that he must have been taken captive. Kidnapping people and selling them as slaves was quite common in ancient times. Why wasn’t anyone coming to Egypt to search for him?
The only possible reason that no one was searching for him was if his brothers had come home and justified their actions as to why they sold him and his father approved of what his brothers had done to him. Perhaps, after all, he did deserve the punishment that they had meted out to him! Maybe he was guilty for accusing them of things that they had not really done. Perhaps Hashem had put him into an Egyptian dungeon to atone for his terrible sin of spreading false stories about his brothers? Certainly Hashem doesn’t punish someone without a reason. At no time did he ever suspect that his father thought him dead. Such a thought never entered his mind. It just couldn’t be possible! No father gives up the search for a son unless he has positive proof that his son is dead, so why wasn’t his father searching for him? Perhaps indeed his father didn’t want him home because of his bad behavior toward his brothers, and the jealousy he was causing - just as Avrohom had sent Yishmoel away from home.
When his brothers showed up in Egypt and told him that they had entered through ten different gates because they were searching for their lost brother, he obviously knew they were telling the truth. Yet, he didn’t know if they were searching for him in order to bring him back home or to do something evil to him.
He was also very worried over why Binyomin had not come along with them. Where was Binyomin? Had they perhaps done the same thing to his younger brother that they had done to him, and weren’t telling him the full truth? Perhaps some catastrophe had befallen him on the way. This is why he told them that they must bring Binyomin to Egypt the next time they came. Only then would he find out if they were indeed telling the truth and that no harm had befallen him.
By putting the money back into their bags it would guarantee that they would have to come back immediately, in order to return the money. They would then be forced to bring Binyomin along - since he had told them that without their brother Binyomin they could not get to see him. This would also assure him that in the meantime they wouldn’t dare cause him any harm.
He had no way of knowing that his father had assumed him dead and therefore feared to let Binyomin out of his sight. In fact, when he asked his brothers where their missing brother was, they said they were searching for him and made no mention of the fact that they had told their father that he was dead. At no time did they tell him the truth - that his father had assumed him dead and therefore wouldn’t let Binyomin out of his sight. This fact Yehudah first told him much later on, when he wanted to keep Binyomin as a slave. Had Yosef ever suspected that his father thought that he was dead, and that is why he wasn’t searching for him, he certainly would have done everything in his power to contact him immediately and let him know that he was alive and well. After all, he had no right to leave his father grieving for him and wait for his dreams to come true. This is best left to G-d to handle.
As viceroy of Egypt he then had to find a way to get to see his dearest brother, Binyomin, once again and find out what was going on. He needed to be sure that nothing bad had befallen him, as well. The only way to accomplish this was by accusing his brothers of being spies and demanding that they bring Binyomin to prove their innocence. This way he would have some privacy with his brother and find out what was happening. This way he could also find out if they had forgiven him for his misdeeds, and decide if his father wanted him back home.
At first he planted their money in their bags so that when they got home and discovered the money they would immediately be forced to return it. When they returned, they would be forced to bring Binyomin with them. It was a catch 22. They would be forced to come back with his brother Binyomin immediately. What a great plan it was, to see his brother right away.
He didn’t know that his father would never allow Binyomin out of the house because he feared that he would die like his brother and mother. Actually, he may have feared that perhaps they had done the same thing to Binyomin that they had done to him, but were trying to hide that fact from him and were not telling him the whole truth - just as they lied to him about their brother Yosef. “He was missing” is all they had told him. They never told him that they had sold him.
When his brothers finally came back with Binyomin, he was relieved to see him unharmed and wanted to speak to him in private and find out what was going on. Yehuda would never allow this, and wouldn’t let him out of his sight for a moment. He had taken personal responsibility for Binyomin. Yosef therefore devised a simple plan whereby he could get Binyomin back to Egypt and talk to him in private and tell him who he really was. He planted the magical cup in Binyomin’s bag. This would give him the perfect pretext to detain Binyomin. As soon as Binyomin would come back, he would reveal the truth to Binyomin and then find out why his father hadn’t searched for him and didn’t want him home. Little was he ready for what was about to happen. He was sure that his brothers would return home without Binyomin and simply tell their father that he had been imprisoned in Egypt, just as Shimon had been, and that would be it.
He was absolutely shocked when for the very first time Yehudah told him that Yaakov had assumed his son Yosef to be dead and it was therefore that he did not want to send Binyomin. Never did it dawn on Yosef that his father presumed him dead! This was a real shocker! Until then, they had said that their brother was lost and they came to find him. Only then did he realize the terrible pain his father must be going through, and why he had not sent anyone to search for him. Yosef wasted no time and revealed his true identity to them immediately. Only then did he realize his terribly mistake, and how wrong he had been!